


All That Lack Of Confidence

by jhopefulyoongi



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alpha Jisoo, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, Jealousy, Jeonghan Is A Great Friend, M/M, Omega Seungcheol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 17:04:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7900777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jhopefulyoongi/pseuds/jhopefulyoongi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seungcheol was nearly always confident. Except for when it came to being Jisoo's mate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All That Lack Of Confidence

**Author's Note:**

> A huge thank you to my beta jooniebiased on tumblr, she's amazing and I wouldn't have gotten through this fic without her.

"Jeonghan," he called gently. 

Jeonghan rolled over in bed so he was facing him and lifted his head off his pillow, just enough to show that he was listening. 

"Mmm?" He hummed softly, sounding tired. 

Seungcheol paused for a moment, trying to figure out a way that the question won't sound weird, but he couldn't seem to find one. "What do I smell like?" 

"What?" Jeonghan said, rubbing at his eyes. 

"Is there something wrong with the way I smell?" 

Jeonghan sat up on his elbow, a curious expression gracing his perfect features in the moonlight. "Why do you wanna know?"

Seungcheol huffed softly and Jeonghan laughed. 

"Just answer." Seungcheol prompted him, feeling even more embarrassed. He could feel a slight burn just underneath his cheeks. 

"Everyone smells different, depending on the person," Jeonghan said with a knowing look. "Just because you smell one way to me doesn't mean you'll smell the same to someone else. It depends on the person," Jeonghan paused, "And what their relationship with that person is." He added.

"Yeah, I know." Seungcheol said.

"Then why did you ask?" Jeonghan said with a laugh. 

Seungcheol’s hands came up to briefly cover his face. "I-"

Just then, one of their other roommates piped up irritably from his bed, "Hyung! Will you let me sleep?"

"Sorry, Jihoonie." Jeonghan said, soft enough not to disturb the other kids. "I was comforting Coups-ah." 

Jihoon grumbled something unintelligible and rolled over, a plushie or two falling on the floor. 

"Why doesn't he just talk to Jisoo-hyung instead of doing this in the middle of the night?" Jihoon said to no one in particular. 

Seungcheol almost flinched. The fact the kids knew what the problem was made him feel...vulnerable? 

"Sorry, kids." He laid back down and pulled the covers over his head, his heart feeling heavy. 

A second later he was being pushed over and Jeonghan was slipping underneath the blanket with him, wrapping an arm around his waist. 

"You have your own bed." Seungcheol said, voice muffled by his pillow. 

"I'm being nice to you and leaving my bed to comfort you, so be quiet and sleep." Jeonghan ran his fingers through his bangs. 

"By the way, you smell like a warm bubble bath." 

"Clean bedsheets." Jihoon added from somewhere in the darkness. 

"Comfort." Minghao said in a voice so sleepy Seungcheol wondered if he was actually awake. 

Jeonghan hummed "To everyone, you have a nice smell, so don't worry about that." He then wrapped his other arm around Seungcheol, muttering a soft goodnight to the younger omegas, who echoed back at him just as softly. 

They fell asleep not long after, but Seungcheol was left still awake with his thoughts. If it wasn't his smell, what else could be wrong with him? 

.......

"You look tired, did you not sleep well last night?" 

Just his voice and the feeling of his breath made all the hairs on the back of his neck stand up straight and his skin tingle. 

"I'm fine." Seungcheol said, feeling a little dizzy with Jisoo pressed so closely against him. He turned around and went to step past him, but Jisoo caught him gently, making him look up at him.

"Make sure you sleep, alright?" Jisoos hand moved up from his wrist to pat him lightly on his shoulder, before stepping away from him, shooting him a soft smile before leaving the room. 

It was like this everyday, and had been every day since he had first met Jisoo. He was gentle, and cared for and looked out for him... But he never DID anything. He wouldn't even consider them that close, at least not any closer than two members who weren't mates were. They were friends, but.....he wasn't special to Jisoo. It was like he was just another member; another good friend, but not a mate. 

"Are you okay?" Jeonghan asked, suddenly appearing in front of him. He hadn't even noticed him coming in. 

"I'm fine," he repeated quickly, turning his back to the other omega and quickly picked up the syrup, drizzling some into his coffee. 

Jeonghan leaned on the counter next to him. "Are you really? What were you and Jisoo talking about?"

"Nothing." He said. "He just asked me if I had been sleeping." 

"You looked pretty close." Jeonghan said, sounding like he was trying not to smile. 

"Were you watching us?"

"Of course," Jeonghan said, without a blink. "I need to make sure my baby Coups is okay," 

"I'm older than you." 

"Since when does that make you not my baby?" 

"Don't you like Jisoo better anyway?"

"Jesus, where did that come from?" Jeonghan said, actually taking a step back from him. 

Seungcheol sighed. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that." He said, catching the other omegas eyes. 

Jeonghan patted his head softly, not looking all that bothered. "It's okay, I know you didn't."

Jeonghan paused for a moment. "Besides, I have Seokmin, what do I need Jisoo for?" 

Jeonghan’s following yelp could be heard all the way across the hall. 

.....

Seungcheol was very aware that Jeonghan and Jisoo were just best friends. There was absolutely no reason for him to be jealous or feel insecure when they were together. Especially because Jeonghan was mated and would never hurt Seokmin, and it wasn't like Seungcheol was against the idea of omegas and alphas being friends, he really wasn't. Half of his closest friends were Alphas. 

But that didn't stop him from having those feelings. 

And the worst thing about it? He felt angry at both of them for it. They didn't do anything wrong. They were friends, they deserved to be able to spend time together without him being like this.

"Jihoon-ah." 

"Yes?" Jihoon said, looking up when he heard the leaders sad tone. 

"Do you ever get jealous when Soonyoung hangs out with Seungkwan or Minghao?" 

Jihoon was looking even more confused by the second. "Why would I be jealous? We're all friends."

Seungcheol recognized the faded scar of teeth on the junction between Jihoon’s neck and shoulder and smiled sadly.

 

"Never mind." 

......  
As far as Seungcheol was concerned he was never the way he was expected or supposed to look. 

He wasn't effortlessly cute like Jihoon or Minghao, he wasn't a complete knock out like Jeonghan or Wonwoo, he didn't have Seungkwan’s pretty face and overwhelming charm. 

Why couldn't he just look the way he was supposed too? It would be so much easier that way. 

He had been fortunate to have thick thighs and large hips and a nice butt, those were some things he liked about himself. In fact those were the only things. 

The rest of him.....

It was probably why Jisoo didn't want him. Jisoo deserved someone cute, pretty, beautiful, sexy, all of those things, and he wasn't any of them.  
......

"You can talk to me about what's bothering you, you know that right?" Jeonghan asked, once again laying in bed with him on top of the covers. Except now all the lights were on and the kids could be heard bustling around in the other rooms. 

Jeonghan’s freshly washed hair smelled like peaches, and there was still water droplets running down his neck from his shower. Seungcheol was in the same state, except he was sure he didn't look as ethereal as Jeonghan did. 

"We're supposed to be mates," Seungcheol said, eyes downcast. 

"You are mates." Jeonghan said, feeling the need to chime in. 

"He doesn't act like it. He never has. He hasn't even claimed me yet, Jeonghan." Seungcheol voice cracked and he broke off. "Why doesn't he want me?" He continued, a tremble in his voice.

"Seungcheol...." Jeonghan murmured sadly, wanting to comfort his friend.

"What's wrong with me?" Seungcheol asked, but he wasn't really sure who he was asking. Was he asking himself? He didn't have the answers, he was still trying to figure it out. Was he asking Jeonghan? Who would always be a better fit for Jisoo then him. Was he asking Jisoo? Who was always gentle and kind to him, but then again, wasn't he that way to everyone? 

"Nothing's wrong with you. Jisoo is just an idiot." 

Seungcheol put his head in his pillow, trying to hold in the tears that were threatening to fall. "He's not a idiot." He protested. "I wouldn't want me either." 

"Seungcheol-" 

"Hey hyung the kids are-is everything okay?" 

Seungcheol’s body went stiff and still. Why did he always have to show up at times like this?

The room went quiet for a minute and Seungcheol could feel them both looking at him, feel their eyes on his burning back, but he didn't say anything and he didn't look up. 

"Everything is fine." Jeonghan said eventually. "I'll go handle the kids." 

Seungcheol felt Jeonghan get off the bed, listened to him leave the room. For some reason he thought Jisoo went out with him, so his whole body jumped when he felt him lay down next to him. 

"Hey," Jisoo said in English. 

Seungcheol didn't respond. 

Jisoo shifted himself closer to him, one of his hands started stroking soothing lines up and down his back. Without him thinking about it, he moved closer to Jisoo too, until he was pressed up against the alphas body, his face hidden in his shoulder. It wasn't broad but it was strong, he could feel the lean muscle underneath his skin and it nearly made his toes curl. 

Jisoos other arm snuck underneath his body to hold him, while the other was still rubbing his back. 

His whole body was trembling with excitement and sensitivity and emotion. Jisoo had never done this to him before. He hugged him occasionally and they had slept next to each other in the past, but this felt so intimate. 

"Jisoo." He whispered.

"Mmm." 

Seungcheol didn't say anything as Jisoos hand moved up from his back to gently pet his hair.

He fell asleep like that, in his alphas arms, for the first time. 

.....

He had woken up in bed by himself, not feeling tired for the first time in what was probably several months.

His body was nice and relaxed, and he felt calm. The bed was covered in Jisoo's cool and refreshing scent,like rain and mint leaves. 

Minghao, Jeonghan and Jihoon were all already gone by the time he woke, making him wonder how long he had been sleeping. Now that he thought about it, maybe they had gone to sleep in the other omega room with Seungkwan Dino and Wonwoo since Jisoo was in there and their mates might not have wanted them to be there. If that was the case, he would have to apologize for the inconvenience. 

He had those thoughts, but he wasn't worried and he didn't feel stressed, his brain felt cloudy in a good way. 

He hugged the pillow closer to him and subconsciously smelled it, Jisoos sent ran through him and made his body tingle all over. 

"Did you sleep well last night?"

Seungcheol jumped slightly.

Jisoo was leaning up against the doorframe and he just looked so good, Seungcheol couldn't stop himself from slowly taking in his appearance, every detail of his perfect features.

His ruffled peach hair laying fluffy against his forehead, his bare face was soft and handsome and the sunlight streaming in reflected off his eyes and made them look a shimmering golden brown.

A white t-shirt that was loose enough to show off the graceful curls of his collarbones and the gray sweatpants that carefully outlined his- 

Something in Seungcheol’s abdomen churned dangerously. He had a hard time swallowing the sudden lump in his throat and making himself not stare.

He cleared his throat. "Yes, um...thank you, Jisoo."

Jisoo smiled at him carefully and stood up straight, coming to join him on the bed once more. 

"Did you stay here all night?" Seungcheol asked cautiously once the younger was settled, back up against the headboard and legs laid out across the mattress neatly. 

Smile. "Of course, you were sleeping so well I didn't want to bother you." 

When Jisoo reached out and started petting his hair again, he felt like purring or doing something equally as embarrassing.

He was suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to reach up and grab his hand, to intertwine their fingers together.

And because he was an idiot, he did just that. 

Except he didn't intwine their fingers as much as he just slapped his hand over Jisoos hand and held onto it. 

His hand went still on top of his. For a second he was afraid Jisoo would pull away but he just let off a soft laugh and intertwined their fingers together himself after moving so he was lying close to him. 

"You're quiet this morning." Jisoo observed, bringing down their hands so they sat in between them. 

Seungcheol peeked up from the pillow he was still half hiding in. 

Jisoo smiled when their eyes met and all he could think about for a moment was how badly he wanted to be kissed. 

How badly he wanted Jisoo to just grab him by the hips and get on top of him-

 

"The others should be coming back soon with lunch." Jisoo said, thumb caressing the back of his hand. 

"Stay with me?" Seungcheol asked, before he could stop himself. 

Jisoo let go of his hand and for a moment his heart stopped, but Jisoo just moved closer to him, sharing his pillow and putting the hand he had been holding on his hip.

"As long as you want me too."

.....

Jeonghan kept on giving him looks. 

Probably because he could tell just how pissed off he was. Everyone besides Jisoo seemed to be able to tell just how pissed off he was.

They were doing their daily scheduled work, and had just finished doing their rehearsal. And on the way back to their waiting room they had stumbled across a newly debuted group. 

One of whom, seemed to really admire Jisoo. 

Which was fine. Seungcheol had first felt pride that someone had recognized his mates talent and wanted to praise him for it. And then they just got a little bit closer, which was still fine, he could deal with that, people accidentally overstepped boundaries all the time without realizing it, it wasn't really their fault. 

Besides, this person looked young, around their age, and while most of their group was already mated, usually people around their age weren't usually mated. 

Plus, Jisoo had no marks on him, no omega scent, no anything to show that he had already found his mate.

Seriously, it was getting to the point where he was seriously going to lose his temper if- 

And no, there goes the hand on the arm. 

Seungcheol stormed off towards the dressing room, shoving his way in between the two of them as he passed. 

"Hyung!" 

Seungcheol purposely ignored that and walked into the waiting room, a few staff members looked up at him in quiet concern but he just sat himself down, angry at himself and his behavior. 

About twenty seconds later Seungkwan strolled in and sat down next to him. 

Seungcheol wanted to apologize for his immature actions, but Seungkwan beat him to talking.

"Jisoo-hyung is kind of like Hansol." He said. "Even though they always act out of the best intentions, sometimes they hurt people without realizing it." 

Before he could say anything in reply, the rest of the members came bustling in, quieter than usual. 

Jisoo followed them in a moment later and took Seungkwan’s vacated seat. Jisoo reached out for him, trying to rest a hand on his, but he pulled it away and purposely turned away from him, keeping his gaze on the wall not three inches away from his face. 

The room went so quiet it felt sickening. 

Seungcheol couldn't stand this anymore. He just couldn't. He had been trying to accept the fact that maybe Jisoo just didn't want him and that he would have to just live with that truth but after seeing that, Jisoo with another someone else, he just couldn't stand it. He couldn't stay quiet anymore, 

"What is it?" He asked. 

And the room went even quieter, if that was possible, like the air itself had stilled and everyone had stopped breathing. Which was certainly a possibility with this groups dramatics. 

"I don't...." Jisoo trailed off. 

Seungcheol whipped around to face him and he become aware of the tears trickling down his own face. 

"What's wrong with me?" 

He heard as everyone escaped the room, members, managers, staff, they all left in a hurry, leaving just the two of them there alone. 

Someone turned the light off on their way out, probably accidentally, out of habit. The door shut behind everyone finally. 

Neither of them moved to put on the light, they could see each other fine without it. 

"What do you mean?" Jisoo asked. 

"You know." He choked out.

"I really don't." Jisoo said calmly as Seungcheol kept on crying. 

"Don't cry," Jisoo said. He reached out slowly enough to give him time to push him away, and when he didn't Jisoo gently cradled his face in his warm palms, brushing away his tears with his thumbs. "Talk to me." 

"Why don't you ever-" he broke off, choking on a sob. "Why haven't you ever-why don't you-why am I not-" 

"Hey, calm down." Jisoo cooed, pulling him closer to him. Seungcheol went weak in his arms, curling himself into his chest, hands gripping the back of Jisoo's shirt tightly. 

"I'm not pretty like Jeonghan or cute like Jihoon. Is that why?" 

"That's not true!" Jisoo said with so much passion that it shocked Seungcheol into not crying. 

"What?" 

Jisoo’s gentle fingers dragged through his dark hair. "Don't compare yourself to them, they’re beautiful and cute, but so are you. You're so beautiful, Cheol. I could just look at you all day every day, for the rest of my life." He kissed the top of his head and his heart jumped wildly in his chest. "Your hair is so fluffy and your eyes are so soft and your skin is so clear and perfect and your nose-" Jisoo broke off, sounding embarrassed at his own ranting. Not that Seungcheol even noticed that, he was so stuck in disbelief. "You're so cute sometimes I feel like I might die. Even your aegyo is cute and I usually just find it cringe when anyone else does it but you're so adorable. And your body-" Jisoo made a noise similar to choking and stopped himself. He didn't want to scare Seungcheol by talking about how delicious he found his arms and thighs.

"How could you ever think any of that?" Jisoo muttered against his hair, and his heart stopped. "How could I ever not want you?" 

Seungcheol looked up at him. 

Jisoo didn't look back at him, staring out above his head. 

"I’ve always thought that I don't deserve you." Jisoo kissed his forehead. "That's why I never did anything, sweetheart." He said the last word in English, but he recognized it as some kind of endearment. 

"What do you mean?" Seungcheol said, pulling himself out of his arms and facing him. 

"I don't think I could pleasure and take care of you. I'm not a strong Alpha." 

"You are!" Seungcheol insisted. "You're more than enough!" 

Jisoo smiled, but in a sad way. 

"Could I really ever be the Alpha that you deserve?"

"You already are!" Seungcheols tears had dried up and he almost felt angry. "You're so amazing Jisoo, you're all I could ever want."

"And what's 'all you could ever want?'" Jisoo asked, deciding to humor Seungcheol. 

"You make my heart feel like it's going to jump out of my chest and you always make me feel happy and safe, isn't that enough?" He asked, a blush coating his cheeks. "You're so gentle and I love that about you and you're so comforting and caring. It's like whenever I'm having a hard time you always know and you always take care of me. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed and you’re just... always there for me. You're all I could ever want in a mate and so much more. So please don't think you're not enough because you are." 

He looked up at Jisoo and saw the overwhelming adoration in his eyes and he almost started crying all over again because he had dreamed about Jisoo looking at him like that. 

"I can't believe that really all this time we were both just-" he cut himself off, taking a deep breath before looking firmly up at Jisoo. "Let's prove each other wrong, okay?" He realized what he had said and dropped his gaze, feeling unsure. Without thinking about it he took Jisoo's hand in his. 

"Can't we at least do that?" He asked softly. "Can't we at least just try?" 

Jisoo's hand tightened around his, making him look up. Before he could blink the alpha had moved forward and claimed his lips, his free hand gently holding his cheek. 

There was a knock on the door and Jeonghan poked his head in just as they desperately pulled apart. 

"It's time to perform." He looked at the little space between them thoughtfully. "Everything okay?" 

Seungcheol gave him a small smile. He wouldn't say everything was okay, but more things were certainly okay then they had been before. 

Jisoo leaned forward and kissed the patch of skin that he planned to put his claim mark on one day. 

Hopefully soon.

**Author's Note:**

> I was thinking of doing a sequel of some sort? Lemme kno if you'd like to see something like that


End file.
